Pro-Love: An Alternative to Pro-Life vs. Pro-Choice
I don’t need to tell you that this is a hot topic today…and has been for a while. These questions have been the topic of news reports, talk shows, debates, etc. There are many organizations promoting either side, all with plenty of weight and pull to influence the media and the general public. We, as the public, seemed forced to choose a side. We delve into our philosophies, beliefs, and religions to come up with the answer. What’s right and what’s wrong? Who gets to decide? The people? The government? – so many questions. It’s safe to say that this whole issue has become extremely complicated.
“Sometimes the questions are complicated, but the answers are simple.” – Dr. Seuss
What’s the answer?
Unplanned pregnancies bring with them an array of emotions. Sometimes it’s joy and happiness mixed with nervousness. Sometimes it’s shame and guilt mixed with fear. Sometimes it’s somewhere in between. Again, a seemingly complicated situation.
Amy Ford has been there. She is running an organization that’s bringing hope and support to women with unplanned pregnancies. Her journey to starting Embrace Grace began the same way, with an unplanned pregnancy. She experienced shame, loneliness, fear and a multitude of other emotions. She even had to face the decision of keeping the baby or not. This is where it gets complicated. Some would say she deserved a release from the stress being caused, and others would say the baby’s life was more important than whatever the mother was feeling. Again, from the outside it might seem like a simple, easy choice, but from Amy’s perspective, and many other women with unplanned pregnancies, it isn’t. What Amy needed was not relief from stress, but support and love from those around her. After all, how to you defeat shame and loneliness? With unconditional love and support.
We, as a community and with organizations like churches, can love and support these women, not just in their decision to keep a baby, but with actual support throughout the entire process and after the baby is born. The church has been guilty of convincing young women with unplanned pregnancies to keep their baby and then stepping away from the situation. Amy’s mission is to change that, and it’s happening all over the country now. Amy is teaching churches, and all of us, what it means to be “pro-love.”
If we would step back from debating and simply love, we would see a huge shift in our culture. Instead of being pro-choice or pro-life, be pro-love. You see, we have been forced to choose a side, but what if we step outside of the box and simply choose love.
Love is selfless. Love is patient, kind, not seeking its own. (See 1 Cor. 13) As a mother with an unexpected pregnancy, what does choosing love look like in your situation? As a church, what does love do in these situations. The answers to these questions may be simple, but it doesn’t mean they are easy. They require a lot from us.
But if love was at the center of it all…
What does love do to judgement or shame, to loneliness or fear? How would we make decisions if we truly choose a selfless love?
So, pro-life? Or pro-choice? Or pro-love?
We need to find the answers to complicated issues like these, not just for us, but for those who are coming. It’s a large part of building a legacy. This isn’t the first time an issue like this has plagued society, and it won’t be the last. We don’t need to lose heart, though. Let’s instead start by asking that question:
What does love look like in this situation? What does love do?
You might be surprised how simple the answer is.